Why I Won't Call Us "Neurospicy"
The Problem with "Neurospicy" and Other Cute Neurodivergent Terms
You've seen them everywhere on social media. "Neuro-spicy." "Type C Mom." "Just a little sensory." These trendy euphemisms for neurodivergence might seem harmless—even endearing—but they're creating a dangerous barrier to real support for neurodivergent children.
I'm Christie, a neurodivergent mom and nurse navigating life with two young kids and countless therapy appointments. While I understand the appeal of making neurodivergence sound less clinical and more approachable, I've learned that these cute terms often do more harm than good.
Why "Neurospicy" Language Fails Neurodivergent Children
When we soften the language around neurodivergence, we accidentally make it harder for parents, teachers, and even children themselves to recognize actual needs and access appropriate support systems.
The Reality Behind Cute Neurodivergent Terms
"Just ADHD" isn't just hyperactivity. It's impulsivity, rejection sensitivity, executive dysfunction, and emotional dysregulation that—without proper support—leads to significantly higher rates of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse.
"A little anxious" might actually be gastrointestinal distress, food refusal, night terrors, and panic attacks that can develop into severe mental health crises without intervention.
"Just sensitive" could be interoceptive confusion that makes children vulnerable to not recognizing danger, abuse, or their own physical needs.
The Research is Clear: Stakes Are Life-Threatening
The long-term consequences of missed neurodivergent support are severe:
Substance abuse: Around 25% of people with substance use disorders meet the criteria for ADHD, while one in two people diagnosed with ADHD have substance use issues
Vulnerability to abuse: Neurodivergent children are up to 3 times more likely to experience maltreatment in the forms of bullying, physical, and sexual abuse
Suicide risk: Up to 66% of autistic adults have considered suicide, and autistic children are 28 times more likely to attempt suicide
When we don't name what's happening accurately, we can't address it. When we can't address it, children suffer—not just in childhood, but for years to come.
Neurodivergent Parenting: What We're Doing Instead
Supporting Neurodivergent Children with Clarity, Not Cuteness
We're choosing precise language over palatable euphemisms. We're using accommodations before the crash, not after. We're teaching language that honors needs, not just behaviors.
Real-life example: Yesterday we went to the zoo. Spent $100 in a blink. The kids hated most of it. So we left after an hour with two smiling, sweaty kids and zero regrets.
Sometimes success isn't how long you stay—it's how well you leave.
Practical ADHD and Autism Support Strategies
Immediate actions for neurodivergent parenting:
Use accommodations proactively, not reactively
Say no to known triggers without guilt or lengthy explanations
Try naming it to tame it
Building your neurodivergent support toolkit:
Keep detailed behavioral records for referrals ("covers ears in Target, cries at toilet flushing")
Create a sensory go-bag with ear defenders, comfort snacks, visual aids, comfort objects
Learn advocacy language for school, family, and public situations
The Long-Term Cost of "Neurospicy" Language
The alternative to proper neurodivergent support isn't just harder days or more meltdowns. It's:
Children who grow up thinking they're broken instead of different
Teenagers who turn to substances to cope with sensory overwhelm they were never taught to manage
Adults who struggle with relationships, jobs, and mental health because their foundational needs were never addressed
The cute language might feel easier in the moment, but neurodivergent children deserve better than easy. They deserve accurate, supportive, and protective language that leads to real help.
Supporting Children: Your Next Steps
You don't owe strangers an explanation for leaving early, using accommodations, or being "that family." But you do owe your child—and yourself—support that actually works.
Start today:
Replace euphemistic language with accurate descriptions
Document specific behaviors and triggers
Research neurodivergent-affirming professionals in your area
Connect with other parents who prioritize real support over social comfort
Remember: You don't need a diagnosis (I highly recommend it though) to begin supporting your neurodivergent child, but accurate language and proper support can literally save their life.
Want more real talk about neurodivergent parenting? Join us at Behind the Stims for weekly insights without the fluff, or follow along on Instagram for daily support and wins.
Until next time…Keep Stimming,
Christie